While applying for your MBA, there is so much you want to tell the admissions committee – and usually only very limited space in your essays to do so!
This means that you must make them count to and a spot in top MBA programs like London Business School, Stanford GSB, or Duke Fuqua and that essays that are unstructured, convoluted, or confusing will be immediately set aside. On top of that, it is essential that you use the space provided wisely to highlight your achievements, proactive drive, and potential for impact.
At Ellin Lolis Consulting, we feel that the best way to do so is by talking about examples from your past in your admissions essays using the tried-and-trusted STAR method.
STAR stands for Situation, Task, Action, and Results.
In other words, a good story in an MBA admissions essay will talk about a situation you were in, a task or challenge that you were presented with, the action you took to overcome that challenge, and the results of what happened. In order to tell a compelling story, you must address all of these parts. Using the STAR method will help keep your stories organized for readers in a way that will make them want to continue reading even more about you.
Here’s how it works:
- Situation – Begin with setting the stage and presenting the complication or conflict of the story. For example: “My brand was losing market share to a new competitor”
- Task – Identify your objective in light of the complication and summarize the task or project performed: “I decided to revise our strategy”
- Action – Describe the action steps you took toward your goal: “I surveyed customers to learn what traits they valued and implemented product changes accordingly”
- Results – Summarize the outcome and how you and/or your team made a difference: “We gained 20 additional market share.” or “I learned the importance of agile leadership.”
To make sure you can effectively apply STAR to your examples, we have compiled our top tips for handling the topic below!
STAR Tip #1: Include the necessary context
Of course, to understand any story fully, a reader always needs the proper context.
Context means including all background information that the reader needs to know about the situation.
For example, if you are going to discuss that time that you were able to save 100 employees’ jobs through your analytics skills and leadership, your situation would be the reasons why these employees were going to lose their jobs (such as a necessary budget cut) and why this was a problem (for example, you knew that most of these employees were older and would have a difficult time finding replacement jobs to support their families).
If you do not include this information, the rest of your STAR will be unclear since it will be difficult for readers to understand why you needed to solve the problem in the first place.
In this section, you also want to include any relevant details – such as where you were working at the time, what role or position you held at the company, and if you were working in a team. We also recommend you always include the month and year that the story happened for readers.
Of course, there may also be numerous additional details that you will need to provide the reader to make sure they understand your story – but those will vary depending on each story you tell.
STAR Tip #2: Every good story needs a challenge
The task part of your STAR functions to set up the drama for readers – by presenting the challenge you had to overcome.
That is because tension is a great storytelling technique!
Tension means presenting a conflict or a problem that your reader feels must be resolved. It is one of the main elements that motivates them to continue reading your essay until the end.
Imagine a story where someone was eager to sign up for a marathon and trained pretty hard before competing. The race went smooth, the work paid off, and that someone won the marathon. This story is neither compelling nor interesting because it lacks tension or a concrete problem that must be solved. Rather, everything seems just pretty easy.
Now imagine that someone began training for the race a year ahead of time, only to break their ankle two weeks in. However, after months of recovery, physical therapy, and a subsequent double-time training routine did they win the marathon anyways. In contrast to the previous version, the tension – or conflict – in this story keeps the reader on their toes to find out what happened.
The task in your story features a challenge that needs to be resolved, so your reader will be motivated to find out how you achieved that.
Make sure to describe the specific challenge involved – keeping it general won’t cut it here! For example, rather than just saying, “I needed to save the company,” rephrase to include more details like this:
“Observing bad people management practices – like overworking employees and a lack of empathy – from leadership and our high turnover rate, I knew our company would not survive unless things changed.”
To describe the challenge, be sure to include why the challenge was a problem (if you did not include that information in the situation part of your STAR).
STAR Tip #3: Explain how you took action
Next step – action!
For this part of your story, it is time to focus on exactly what you did to tackle the issue and complete the task at hand. This should include all necessary action steps to achieve the results.
For example, to show how you tackled the previous challenge of saving employees’ jobs, you can include the following action steps:
- The effort you made to compile new data that was not previously included in the company’s model
- How you developed a new analysis to highlight non-human budget cuts that could benefit the company
- What you did to present this effectively to senior management
This section should illuminate what made you stand out from others who might have been tasked with similar responsibilities – what approaches did you take? What work did you do to ensure success? How did you go above and beyond to solve the problems at hand? These are all questions that can help you choose which actions are most important to highlight – those that make you stand out and show how you achieved results.
One mistake that our clients often make while discussing their actions is that they either are too general about what they did or simply list a series of statements about what they did without explaining how they got there. To help avoid this issue, be sure to provide the reasoning behind your actions, as well.
In our example above, you could rephrase the last point like this:
“Because leadership was staunchly convinced that job cuts were the only solution, I knew I would need to be particularly persuasive to convince them otherwise. Presenting my case, I described what a layoff would mean for two employees I had talked to – both of whom were the sole breadwinners for their families – before overlaying that information with the extensive data I had collected, sure that my twofold approach would sway our director.”
While you could write about every action and process you took, you are most likely limited by word count. Even if you’re not, it’s always a good idea to stay focused, so choose only the most significant actions and those that are most relevant for solving the problem you have presented and your results.
STAR Tip #4: Avoid cliffhangers!
Like any good story, your reader is looking for one thing: resolution! So always be sure to tell the reader how your story ended.
Unlike your favorite series, we don’t want to end with a cliffhanger. The reader should know by the end of your story – and the end of your essay at the latest – what ultimately came out of the experience you describe.
To do so, we recommend you discuss the impact of your actions. This can include both immediate results and, if applicable, broader or long-term results for you or others.
For example, you could discuss how you were able to save all 100 employees’ jobs by making previously overlooked unnecessary material costs, and, in the long-term, the company decided to implement a policy of annually updating their cost-saving models as you had highlighted the importance of maintaining trust with workers.
Additionally, you could include that, after increasing your visibility with management through your unique assessment, you received a promotion.
The main objective in this section is to show why, given your situation and task(s), your particular actions were important. In most cases, your results will prove to the reader how your decisions were meaningful besides providing a conclusion to your story.
Note: for some essays, you may need to demonstrate failure or weakness. In these cases, it is perfectly acceptable to report failed results or no results at all. However, it is extremely important that you discuss why these results happened.
Additionally, you can also discuss projected results if the project you are describing is still underway.
Not sure if your actions and results align with the task or challenge you present? Or how to do so within the often limited word count?
If you are looking for help, don’t hesitate to check out our MBA Resource Center! There, you can find dozens of past successful essays and detailed brainstorming worksheets to help you plan out a winning essay. Our library also includes guides for all top global MBA programs, interview tips and mocks, CV templates, and recommendation letter guides. Click to join!
STAR Tip #5: Explain internal and external results
However, when thinking about results, there is one element you cannot forget.
You must include what you learned.
We often work with clients who use the STAR method effectively but end the paragraph simply with numerical results – what we like to call external results. External results include any tangible or measurable outcome of your story. This can include:
- Money that was saved
- A deal that was closed
- Changes or improvements within your industry
- Lives, behaviors, or mindsets of others that were changed or affected by your actions
- How your job or career progression changed because of your actions
- Improved company statistics or metrics
However, the internal results of your story are just as important. Internal results describe what you learned from the story and any changes to your mindset or values that resulted from the action.
For example, internal results could include the following:
- That you learned to be a more empathetic, down-to-earth, or data-focused professional (this works with any personal value!)
- That you now understand the importance of networking, persuasion, or people skills
- How your perspective about something shifted (e.g. green energy, DEI) after the experience
- How your professional goals or trajectory shifted after the experience
- The ways you now know you must improve or act differently in the future
- How you have since made changes in your personal life (e.g. always putting others first, always ensuring inclusivity in your speech, etc.)
It is critical to discuss what you learned from your example. If you are describing an example in which you succeeded, you should be discussing what strengths or approaches were most important to your success. Discussing lessons learned shows the reader that you can make the most of your experiences and that you take that information forward with you to improve.
That is because all elite business schools value a growth mindset in their candidates and are looking for prospective students who have this trait in every application. By showing what you have learned, you show that you value growing – and learning! – in the first place.
If you are discussing a failure, this aspect is even more important, as you must demonstrate to the reader that you have been able to grow from your mistakes. In this case, show what you realized that you did wrong and how you plan to do things differently in the future.
STAR Tip #6: SART? ATSR? RTSA? No – STAR!
No matter what story you are telling, there is one thing you should always double-check: always make sure your STAR is in the correct order.
While this may feel obvious, it is a common mistake we see when helping applicants tell their stories and leverage STAR.
This is because many of the stories we consume – online, on Netflix, or on good old-fashioned paper – like to mix it up to keep things interesting. They may begin at the end of the story to flash the audience with results, or they may use a convoluted chronology that shows the protagonist scurrying to take action before you even know what the setting of the story is to keep you hooked.
However, for your MBA admissions essay, you should always tell your STAR in the proper order. This helps keep the reader focused and ensures your story aligns and is cohesive throughout your draft.
Even if you may be tempted to mix it up, for your MBA essay, it is best to stay chronological whenever possible.
STAR Tip #7: You are the star of your STAR!
It can be tempting to focus your story on others. This may be because you find their stories particularly inspiring, feel they played a key role in the action of your STAR, or because you worked together as a team.
Believe it or not, this is one of the most common problems we see when helping clients refine their stories – their story is not focused on them.
For example, recently, one candidate wanted to begin their essay for Harvard Business School with this anecdote:
“In 1956, my German great-great-grandfather had a huge fight with his parents because he didn’t want to work as a peasant but instead wanted to study. Although he did not have their support, he enrolled in a high school in a different city and, after nine years of studying by himself, he managed to get his Abitur, the German university qualification. Despite familial pushback, he ultimately studied Mathematics and earned his Ph.D., working as a college Professor for the rest of his life. Through his example, I was raised to value dedicating myself to studying, working, and seizing opportunities.”
Although the client was highly inspired by her grandfather’s actions, she spends considerable space on a story that does not feature her or her achievements.
To avoid this, it would be better to choose a story that shows how she learned to value study, work, and seizing opportunities. Ultimately, the candidate decided to begin her essay with a story about working extra hard to overcome communication difficulties during her exchange to Germany in high school. This way, the candidate remains the protagonist of her story.
The STAR method should make it very easy for your reader not only to understand what took place but to also see your role in all of it. Therefore, the focus of your story must be on you.
Even if it was a team effort, highlight your own actions within the team. You can discuss how you complimented your own approaches with others’ or discuss how you contributed to bigger results, but the emphasis should be on the part you played.
Remember: it is not your company, team, or grandfather that is applying to business school – you are!
Make Sure Your MBA Essays Stand Out
STAR is a helpful way to organize and market your stories, but sometimes it can be extremely difficult to choose what details to include or exclude or how to tailor your story to specific schools and questions.
If this is something you are concerned about, no need to stress! Our award-winning team has the expertise to help you make these critical decisions so that you can write a rockstar essay that will help you get accepted into your top MBA program.
That’s why many candidates turn to us to help put our 98.9% acceptance rate and personalized approach to work for them.
As our client (and Columbia Business School grad) Elisa said, “Ellin Lolis MBA Consulting helped me clarify my goals for the future and communicate those ideas effectively in my various essays. I’m confident that their editing suggestions helped me present myself as the best candidate I could be, which led to acceptances at every school to which I applied.
I would highly recommend Ellin Lolis as they were fantastic at helping me flesh out ideas I had in my head in a way that would make the most impact with an admissions committee. I also appreciated the personalized approach.”
So click here and put our expertise to work for your application!
Real MBA Essays That Got People In
School-specific sample essays that got our clients accepted
